Happiness vs. Anger

Funny story: Today I did an object lesson with a stick, discussed below.  While the kids were thinking, I was holding the stick and hitting my hand.  I then thought about hitting them with the stick.  A scary evil laughter erupted from my gut that startled even me.  Then I started laughing at myself for scaring myself and for finding so much joy in thinking of giving some of those kids a little wack. I totally told the kids what I was laughing at and they definitely gave a sympathy-I'm kinda scared of you cus your nuts- but I'm laughing so you won't hit me  laugh.


In the seventh grade class I am teaching right now we are reading a great book called "Touching Spirit Bear".  It's about a boy, Cole, who has extreme anger issues, has been abused his whole life, beats up another kid, and instead of getting sent to jail is banished to an island to heal.  On his first chance he burns down his shelter, tries to escape, and attacks a "Spirit Bear"- which obviously rips him apart.  Spirit Bears are completely white black bears, 1 in every 10 is born this way. The Tlinget (pronounced Klinket) Indians have spiritual stories on why they are white, they are also the ones who have the idea of sending him to banishment to heal instead of jail to fester.  Anyways, in the end he has a change in heart and gets to go back to the island to try again.  While there a Tlinget elder teaches him a great life lesson with a stick.

                                           
He labels the left side as anger and the right as happiness.  He asks Cole to break the stick to get rid of the anger but keep happiness.  As Cole tries, he realizes with each break there is always a left end of the stick.  At first he is mad and then he realizes there will always be anger and happiness and each are necessary but we have to choose which side of the stick we focus on. He also realizes he can keep "breaking his own sticks" in anger but he'll just keep being angry.

Before we had read the whole scenario in the book, I had the students try to break some sticks from outside to get rid of the anger.  They quickly realized they couldn't.  But some of the options they came up with were so profound for 12-yr-olds.  One said to mold it into a circle so it's a continual progression of good and bad as life happens.  Another suggested we break the stick into tiny pieces so we could each help each other carry the good and the bad.  I was pretty impressed.
                                                  
 We then discussed the idea of both being in out lives forever but having to learn how to honor the bad that happens to us with maybe moments of anger or sadness but focus on happiness.  I then told them for the next 24 hours they had to try to focus on the good and we would discuss how it changed their days the next class. As we discussed those 24 hours today, I had one of those moments where teaching fills you head to foot.

They got it.  They were all able to tell me how focusing on happiness had made their day better.  They all wanted to do it for another 24 hours.

Success.

My two favorite quotes about anger from the book:

"Anger is a memory never forgotten."

“He turned to Edwin. "You know, the stuff you just told me makes more sense than all the weird things the counselors and psychologist have told me in school and at the detention center."
Edwin tapped Cole's shoulder with the broken stick. "That's because those people still think you can get rid of the left end of the stick.” 
(Edwin is the Tlinget elder)


sweet or tart-
When I reread this post I could tell by my overally academic writing I had just finished my last 15 page research paper!!!! Sweet!